Running on Empty

I definitely come across as an organized person, and I genuinely believe comparatively (to what? I don't know, just comparatively) I am an organized person. The problem is I am outwardly organized, in any sense exempt fashion, and have a great ability to organize people and events. Internally is where things are chaotic. I have systems designed only I can process. And usually even I do not understand them. These are sort of 'happen in the moment' systems that two days later fail me--the item appears to be MIA and I throw myself into a neurotic frenzy, bound and determine to locate said thing.

The first order of turbulence begins with the two purses, two wallets--not at the same time but at the same time--structure; the larger purse operates when I need my more sizable belongings (camera, kindle, binoculars, sunglasses) and the smaller for times when money and identification will suffice. The number of incidents where the wallets have not been transferred and I am left unable to pay for one thing or another. Uncountable. This is undoubtedly a no good, very bad system. Yet, I can't break the habit. And need I mention the bigger purse is a magnet for anything and everything in my path... I am scared to reach in and find out what it is exactly that's lurking deep within that bag.

Then there is the minimalist problem. I am deathly allergic to clutter and therefore recycle any paper that comes in my path, regardless of how important it looks. High school diploma equals a waste of paper.

Even worse than these issues... are the examples my friends would be most willing to site. My habitual dilemma of a dead phone. This very thing happened today. I was in the midst of a fourth phone call with a friend when the call ended, not because we were done talking, the charge had left my phone. And rarely, if ever (unless mandated by nanny contract) do I have a revival source nearby. I realize this is such a careless mistake and still I am without a charge-the-phone-at-night or carry the silly two ounce charger (there is definitely room for it in the oversized tote) routine. I will concede having a dead phone is semi liberating... until you are in the situation where you need to be the contact-er.

And admittedly I get more "irresponsibly disorganized" than that with the number of times my car has stopped short of gas. There is no excuse for this: my gas gauge works, I always reset the odometer (see very on top of life), I have money in my bank account to pay for the gas (although paying 50 dollars to fill up a Jetta, not pleasurable), and I live near plenty of gas stations. All my bases are covered and in spite of this my tank goes dry time and time again.

Both of these events happened today. I have mastered the art of dealing with each of these events. Here in lies my problem.