Water You Thinking?

There are few things in life worth stressing over. This list excludes automatic flush toilets! They are so wasteful and more than unneccessary, a major concern for the conservationist in me. They flush when you might not be done, they flush when they are not being used, they flush flush flush whenever they want to. Besides the extremely lazy folks, germ-a-phobes might also be a fans of these flush happy toilets. You see, I am not a germ-a-phobe so grabbing that lever to flush the toilet does not bother me at all. Oh to only have concern for myself! Except it's not only concern for me, its concern for water. The new and improved toilets require 1.6 gallons of water per flush, but the older models still use approximately four gallons of water. Yikes, I could bathe in that. If I controlled public bathrooms there were be signs stating, "If it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down." Let rid ourselves free of the flush happy toilets and save a few gallons by not flushing that sterile cup of pee.

Even the writers of Two and a Half Men agree, "Automatic toilets are terrible, everything is gone before you turn around and check to see how you did!"

So are they going to do it?

In all honesty I never imagined with six games left in the regular season the Atlanta Braves would have an actual shot at the postseason. They are on fire right now, winning fifteen of their last seventeen games. Today they are only two games behind the Colorado Rockies in the National Wild Card Race. The Braves are facing two more games against the Florida Marlins (a team with no postseason prospects) at home and then a four game series against the Washington Nations (who have managed to lose 103 games this season--potentially more embarrassing than their D.C. football brothers loss to the Detroit Lions) at home. Can they pull it off? They can, they have the potential... the pitching, the hitting, the fielding. Will they do it? Please, pretty please!

The Rockies are hosting the Milwaukee Brewers (no postseason dreams for 2009) in a three game series before heading to Los Angeles to face the Dodgers (who have clinched the NL West Division). The Braves schedule looks more promising but the team with a two game advantage with only six games left to play is always going to be a favorite. Who truly likes predictable outcome when there is time on the clock? Not me. I am pulling for the "upset" or a Rockies repeat. Remember 2007 when the Rockies won thirteen or their final games to force the Pirates into a playoff. If the Braves win the next six games... they will have won all thirteen of their final games. It's survive or die!

PS: Atlanta Braves fans are the worst. Statistic confirmed(!!!). Last night only 50.4% of the stadium was full. With all the excitement, how can that be?! A fan like me would die to fill a seat.

I like my Apples green.

Unlike the rest of America I am not 100% on board with Apple and all of their products. That's fantastic since I just purchased a brand new Macbook Pro. Not too mention it came with a nifty iPod Touch, and I already own a regular iPod. Apple prides themselves on being this environmentally friendly company yet their products do not last. In a truly green society shouldn't we encourage longevity in our products... not products that need to be replaced after the warranty expires? Everyone in my family's first iPod committed iPod suicide after two years. The iPods realized (like their American peers) the next generation was so much better they pulled the plug before it was pulled on them. My second iPod just had it's second birthday, we did not do anything big to celebrate. Maybe we should have, now it seems little bit ill... or obsessed with a particular song. Even after manually removing the repeat setting my iPod refuses to stop repeating the first song of a playlist.

That is just prefect since I planned on taking it to Lesotho where I would be able to introduce all the villagers to Tea Leaf Green, Animal Liberation Orchestra, and the Beatles! Yes, I have an iPod Touch (thank you Apple... although I still have not received my rebate!!!) but it seems a little strange to take an iPod whose features will not work without WiFi. Apple wants to charge me $29 dollars to talk to someone on the phone and $34 dollars to talk to someone in the store. God only knows how much to fix it, if if if the problem is fixable. An [Apple] genius told me I would be best buying a new iPod, and he could dispose of the old properly. Dream on, you think like an America! Buy, Use, Dispose! Repeat, as many times as needed. I fell twice and I will not fall again. I do not want the brighter, more storage, newer, classic iPod. I am (or was) content with my aged iPod... until IT STOPPED WORKING! I am not making another $300 investment in a product that will not even last my stay in Lesotho.

I am not totally knocking Apple, comparatively they are a relatively green company. They are expanding their recycling program so I was able to dispose of my old ThinkPad properly. My new Pro has a longer-lasting battery life and meets the EPA's Energy Star Rating. I am also equipped with an aluminum body (recycle friendly) and many harmful toxins have supposedly been eliminated from the processing of new computers/iPods/iPhones. Apple as a company also disclose their annual corporate carbon emissions and show you how exactly it is distributed. That is actually awesome to see (for the few of us who care).

Apple, you bring some longevity and I will bring business.

Chiefs Report

And the Kansas City Chiefs are winless.  This time they went down hard to the Philadelphia Eagles rookies and back-ups, this time away from home, this time I watched the bad football that is the Chiefs.  No offense, little defense, and lots of penalties never wins a game.  Patients, two years of grow and development makes winning teams.  

Exciting in football news, today the Detroit Lions ended there nineteen game losing streak, second worst in NFL history, to the Washington Redskins.  As a fan of the Georgia Bulldogs I am pulling for Matt Stafford.  The Lions are on the rise!  Ha... Ha!  Ironically, their last win was to the Chiefs in my presence... a game I was guaranteed to see the Chiefs win (or so I thought that December 23, 2007).  

Last week I had M.L. to relate too.  This week I have a city stocked with Redskins fans!  While they managed a win against the St. Louis Rams last week, they did not even score a touchdown in the win.  This week they ended the Lions losing streak.  Even though thirty-one of the fifty-three players are new to the Lions (and not at all associated with seventeen of the losses) it still must make you feel a little pathetic.  After all, you were the team that lost to the laughing stock of the NFL.  

Birthday Bonanza

Today I was an additional adult supervisor at H.G.W.'s fifth birthday party, fourteen five year olds dressed as princesses with too much stimulation!  Within five minutes of arriving at the party the little girls were bored.  Did I mention H.G.W. has a toy store in her basement?  What ever happened to entertaining yourself, being patient, and showing kindness by waiting for your other friends to arrive?  Am I asking too much of a five year olds?  It is called respect and manners.  In order to insure everyone had a good time we dove right into the games: pin the tiara on the princess, hot prince frog, and pinata madness (the new safe version where everyone pulls a string instead of whacking it with a bat).  Then we jumped into arts and crafts: at home build-a-bear unicorns, face painting, crown making, and wand decorating.  Next the girls filled their plates with food: chocolate covered strawberries, magic wands (pretzels covered in chocolate with lots of sprinkles), veggies (you could dip in dressing found in Cinderella's carved pumpkin), chicken sandwiches, princess fruit snacks, and a cake in the shape of a crown with ice cream.  If you learned anything from reading the lengthy descriptions... the party was over the top.  You're lucky I did not even go into how the house was decorated!

Now my children will not only be deprived of a consumerism Christmas but also of birthdays... or the parties that come with them.  It's official, birthdays are dumb.  We are celebrating a day you do not even remember. In my opinion it is not an accomplishment to make it to 1, or 10, 0r 13, or 16, or 21, or 50.  Maybe in Lesotho it is, but we live in America.  It is sad to think that the chances of H.G.W. remembering her party that her mom worked on and stressed about for days are slim to none.  The memories she has will be through pictures and video recordings.  I was doing a lot of the recording... oh how badly I wanted to add my commentary.  

Birthday parties are so expensive, there an obligation, they contribute an unlimited amount of paper products to landfills, and are more about gifts than anything else.  All of the birthday bonanza really annoys me. Call me heartless because on your birthday I feel obligated to call and wish you a happy birthday, buy you a gift you told me to get you, or come and celebrate with you.  Frankly though as we get older it's totally meaningless when social networking (a.k.a. Facebook) helped me remember your special day.  I am going to call you when I am thinking of you. Send you cards when I think you need them the most or when I miss you lots.  If I see something that reminds me of you, I am going to buy it then.  Although I truly think non-tangible gifts are the best to buy and receive.  Peer pressure stop dictating the way I celebrate.  I am so over you.  

"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count.  It's the life in your years." (Abraham Lincoln)  Instead of celebrating each year, lets celebrate your accomplishments.  

DWA

Apparently Asians have weak driving skills, who knew? My family has this running joke about Asian drivers. I am sure we are not alone. I have been trained to be aware of bad driving Asians! When an Asian makes a bad move on the road someone in my loving family usually shouts, "Driving while Asian" or more commonly DWA. The joke has gotten so out of hand this summer C.D. convinced ten year old cousin L that Asians were issued tickets similar to a DUI, only instead of being under the influence... they where opperating a car while being Asian. It is as though Asian was an outfit they put on this morning or something they ate. Cousin L believed C.D. so much we literally had to point out Asian drivers to prove it was not against the law and show him C.D. was in fact only kidding. Terrible, right?

When I am cruising down the road alone and someone makes a poor choice on the road I smile and think to myself Driving While: White, Black, Old, Young, With Glasses, Opperating a Cell Phone. I hope my poor choices are slim and never cause harm, but we all make mistakes. The joke is not all terrible: it prevents me from acting with rage, allows me to forgive others, and be thankful I am alive and still cruising!

Serving the Uninsured

I have also been volunteering at the Free Clinic in my town, and I am enjoying it way more than I ever thought possible. It has really opened my eyes to how much there is to do in my own backyard. Volunteering has really challenged my decision to join the Peace Corp. I have always known how much help I could be overseas, but now I am realizing how needed we all are in America. I am not unaware of the issues surrounding education, poverty, and AIDS here in the states.  (These three are being targeted because this is the work I am going to be doing in Lesotho).  I just never imagined a recent college graduate with little experience in these fields could be put to use. Boy was I wrong!  

I am definitely not the doctor at the clinic but sometimes behind the scene work is just as important.  As a volunteer I have learned very personal things about patients at the clinic. It's heartbreaking.  If I ever think I had a bad day I think of those pregnant moms with four kids (already) and no health insurance. How is that possible? While I am not working directly with the patients I am filling prescriptions, reorganizing their charts, and scheduling appointments. I see a lot of personal information about these patients. Its changing me.  Obviously, I am still volunteering which means giving up Thursday night football.    

Consumerism Christmas vs Christly Christmas

I got an email from J.L.W. last night concerning raising children when it comes to church. It got me brainstorming or re-thinking my plans. Of course, nothing in life ever goes according to plan, but it is still nice to have an idea of how I want to raise my children ten plus years from now. J.L.W. grew up going to church every Sunday and cannot really imagine her childhood without it, from Sunday School to Methodist Youth Fellowship (MYF) to confirmation to Ski Trips to working in the Trinity nursery. She never moved, attending the same church from birth to her final high school days. While she is not religious anymore, deterred by the cult-ish appearance of the church going group, her main concern is the holidays.

Her parents taught her Christmas was about the birth of Jesus and not about getting presents. If your children don't go to church and have no clue about Jesus then Christmas is definitely going to be about presents. Despite her disapproval of Christianity she likes the nativity. I can't wrap my head around that because I was not truly brought up in the church. However, if she wants to display baby Jesus and the three wise men and not believe in them I will support a her. I am really not sure how she is going to explain the nativity, maybe she will be showing approval and acceptance of things different from what she believes? J.L.W.'s last request, she does not want to go to church and she is a little against the twice a year Christmas and Easter idea. That makes church seem like a hassle, I agree.

I am confident her email was not meant to be funny but the whole time I was reading it I was terrified at the bottom she was going to tell me she was pregnant. No worries, she's not. Unlike J.L.W. I was not raised in the church so I do not have my childhood working against me. We went to church in spurts of a lot followed by no church at all. C.D. and I were baptized and confirmed, but I would categorize us in the twice a year bunch of church pretenders. It probably made my grandparents happy to know we went to church at all. I am highly oppose to the idea of church at the holidays. This method of religion makes church look like a chore, looks like you only attend to make yourself feel less guilty about not going to the other fifty-two services throughout the year, and confuses the hell out of your children. I definitely do not want to raise my children in a church. My plan is to expose my children to church, take them a couple of times, encourage them to go with friends when invited, discuss and answer any questions they have concerning church. Thank goodness I met several God-loving, bible-worshipping people in my seven year stint in the South, surely they can help me with the questions.

If my family lands in a town where there are lots of church go-ers I am going to find a family activity for us to do on Sunday mornings... volunteering at a soup kitchen or walking dogs and cleaning cages at an animal shelter. After moving to the South I was invited to several churches with 'friends' from school or neighbors I babysat for. J.L.W. was the reason I started going to church, actually we rarely made it to church in my pre-driving years because encouraging my parents to go was close to impossible. On the flip side they were always more than willing to drive me to MYF. I can't blame them too much, it worked to my advantage; MYF was the fun part of the church scene. I went to church to make friends. I was desperate! I want my children to have self-worth on Sundays and a purpose if the rest of the town is at church. I do not want them believing in something merely to fit in. Even if we do not end up living in a town with a strong church community I still want to have some productive family time. I want to teach my children about Atheism, Christianity, Buddhism, Islam, Judaism, etc. This way they can make an informed decision on the path they choose while remaining tolerant of others. I will support them to the best of my ability, hopefully with the encouragement of their loving father.

Finally, as for the holidays my plans are a little more radical. In my ideal world my future family would not celebrate Christmas at all. Christmas is a Christian holiday, if you do not believe that Jesus was born with all these crazy powers, why would you celebrate his birth? Celebrating birthdays of people I do not know (let alone some guy I don't believe ever existed) in not a routine I frequently practice. For those who do not denote themselves Christians I can see how it would be difficult to make Christmas not about the presents.

We are based on a consumerism society. My mom and I were out at Target yesterday (it's SEPTEMBER) and there was Christmas decorations for sale. Oh materialism, where did all your decorations from last year go? Adopt a family that needs a lot more than your children, show your children others boys and girls want coats to keep them warm in the winter and a warm meals to fill their empty stomachs... instead of plastic toys. I am going to plant a pine tree as soon as I settle into a house and hopefully assuming eight to ten years later we are still living in the same house I am going to let the children chop it down. Hopefully this will give them something to be proud of and a distraction from presents, also a great family composting project after Christmas. Smile.

I know it is going to be difficult avoiding the holiday season with children who see their friends sitting on Santa's lap and getting presents... but I am always up for a challenge. If their grandparents spoil them with gifts during the holidays, their will definitely be an after holiday donation/binge. I want my children to accept things that are different from their own beliefs, practice good morals, and be self-confident in who they are and where life is taking them. Of course, every parents probably wants that for their children.

"If there is one thing Christians can't tolerate, it's tolerance." (Unknown)

Be an AID

I have been volunteering at an AIDS clinic since I graduated from college. Initially I signed on board as a way to occupy my time, fulfill my pre-departure Peace Corp requirements, and to simply open my eyes to AIDS. (Fact: Lesotho has the highest population of HIV/AIDS in the world--one fourth of the population!) The things I have learned about AIDS have been truly fascinating. More importantly is what I have learned about our sad society. Since I have no problem being friends with someone who has AIDS or would not mind hiring someone with AIDS I did not realize other did. This disease is still so stigmatized! Hello society, it's 2009! Do you realize some of these kids are born with AIDS? Its not like they asked Santa for AIDS for Christmas. Do you know people who transmit AIDS might not even be aware they have it? So why (why why why) do we make them wear a target on their back and live in total confidentiality? It is not fair! Especially when it's often times its preventable. Stop judging and start being an aid to those in need.

My parents have never discussed sex education in our house. Volunteering for an AIDS Ministry has made me realized how lucky they are (or I am--have not decided which). I also took health three times in high school. The joys of moving! None of my health classes talked about sex education. Lets talk about sexually transmitted diseases in school, get tested for these diseases in school, encourage safe sex in school, and hand out condoms in school. Not every child comes from a background where the parents take responsibility and time to teach about these American denoted touchy subjects. We can not rely on parents, and right now we can't rely on schools either. The US Government is sending me overseas to Lesotho to do HIV/AIDS outreach in schools yet they would not dare not broach the subject in their own schools. There is HIV/AIDS in America. How is that for backwards?

WAKE UP AMERICA! WAKE UP NAIVE PARENTS! Abstinence is not the answer. Youth are having sex, whether you like it or not. If we start teaching about sexually transmitted diseases and safe sex in school we can help stop the spread of these diseases. Not to mention education might reduce the number of teen pregnancies. I am not really sure why sex before marriage and AIDS are still stigmatized in this country. Maybe it's because we are ignorant? I wish I had an answer. For now, my answer is lack of education! A little education goes a long way.

PS: I think this blogs title should be changed to My Rants. The ranting never ends, and I am sure I will still be ranting in Lesotho.

YouTube

Last Sunday four people sent me something to watch on YouTube. It was a historic day! I realized friends and family have already forgotten about me. Yikes, I have not even left the country! There was no rhyme of reason to any of the videos: a strange man cracking open an egg--a double egg, Kayne West stealing a microphone from Taylor Swift (so celebrity!), a riot/party K.A.R. was a witness to over in New Zealand, and a police officer cheering for the University of Georgia right in front of Steve Spurrier's face. To be honest, two of videos were really funny and I have seen other laughable videos on YouTube (mainly imitating Sarah Palin on SNL) but most of them are long(er than one minute) and boring. They are practically movies, and what do I like to do during movies? That's right, sleep!

I simply do not understand YouTube. Maybe there isn't a point?! The thought of wasting six and half minutes of my life in front of a computer screen watching these videos and who only knows how long to find them kills me. Ahh, to be patient! How do you even go about finding a video on YouTube, declaring it a must see, and spreading it all around town? What are you searching for when you tread deep into the world of YouTube? The groups of people who gather around the computer screen at a weekend party or an office lunch break. That, to me, is the funny part! Whatever draws people to YouTube I am clearly missing out on. In all honesty, I am thankful this part of me is missing. Who has time for this?

Dispite my dislike and lack of understanding, I feel guilty if I completely ignore someones YouTube video request. It's like not doing your friend a favor when they ask. I managed to get through these videos in only two days time, and like I said earlier, they were relatively entertaining!

Chiefs n' Chopper

Today the Kansas City Chiefs lost to the Oakland Raiders in there home opener. I did not get to watch the game, and I haven't even read the synopsis. I did watch the ticker while I was watching the not at all exciting Washington Redskins game. I saw that with 2:00 minutes left the Chiefs were up ten to six, meaning it would take a Raiders touchdown to win. Maybe the Raiders had the ball and were working on a touchdown drive long before the two minute warning. I don't know. Even then, how do you let that happen at Arrowhead? You know if they score a touchdown, they win. Game over. Hold them to a field goal, please!

The loss to the Raiders is embarrassing. Tonight, I am wallowing in all my hopes and dreams for the 2009 season! I will forever be loyal to the Chiefs. But in the meantime I am taking my disappointment and fleeing the country! I will not see how the season ends until long after it has finished. It's probably for the better. One can only hope that in two plus years when I return the Chiefs will have a winning season!

Maybe I should not give up on this season, yet. I am confident M.L. has not given up on the Green Bay Packers, and he is dealing with a Packers loss to the Cincinnati Bengals at Lambeau Field. I am not sure which is worse. I am guessing the Packers loss was more of a fluke, and the Chiefs was probably more of a trend. On a night like tonight, it's just nice to know I'm not alone.

Just Say NO

For the first time in my life I was really looking forward to relaxing, really taking advantage of living at home and having no financial obligations. I have been saying this all summer. It still has not happened. In my mind relaxing was going to be babysitting twenty hours a week and volunteering twelve. This was going to be bliss. I say was here because I have yet to babysit less than thirty hours in a week, usually averaging fourty plus (on top of the volunteering).  

Our sixth grade DARE programs taught us to 'Just Say No' to drugs, but what if my addiction is not drugs and instead is work (or the money earned from working). To give you an idea of my challenge, Monday I got sixteen different babysitting offers for the next two weeks. Mind you prior to these offers I already had twenty-five hours scheduled for both of the following weeks.  I only accepted three of the offers, if that counts for anythings.   In all honesty I should have 'Just Said No' to every one because I should be relaxing.  I did not.  That's not me.

This is my idea relaxing!  Who really wants to sit around all day and do nothing?  I have tried and I get bored super quick.  It is not in my personality.  So stop your fretting, I am going to be okay.    

Fat Factory

Dear Olive Garden,

I would like to personally thank you for contributing to obesity in America. In all honesty it would be hard to gain weight without you. I could not think of a better restaurant to dine at (especially for feeling miserable afterwards, significant amounts of weight gain, and affordable-ness). After all for $8.95 I can get unlimited salad/soup, breadsticks, and pasta. Your pasta bowls are so small, only like the size of a crock-pot, so it makes me comfortable knowing seconds come free of charge.

You also really contribute to the backwards American way of life. If you are considering global expansion you might want to take this next suggestion to heart. When I choose to dine at your restaurant with just one other person (two total people, for those keeping tabs) you serve us three breadsticks. Earlier I mentioned these breadsticks are unlimited. Last time I checked, that meant if I wanted more I could make that request with the waiter/waitress. I also know that forty-three tons of food waste is thrown out in America every day. Serving two breadsticks might be more appropriate. Or hell, keep the wasting up, and give us fat couples four.

Sincerely,

A Very Concerned Customer

Half Cross Country Road Trip

Last week I spent four days driving out to Denver with a friend from college. It was so much fun and a great way to see lots of the country in a few short days. R.D.S. and I are opposites in a number of ways, but we managed to fill most of the 37 hours of driving with nonstop rambling. Here is a recap of the trip: We left Leesburg, VA are 4:40AM on Friday headed for Bedford, IN. After eleven hours in the car we went on a fantastic cave tour in the limestone capital of the world. Our guide S was hysterical and had an awesome ascent. Then we continued on to north of Indianapolis, IN to a forgotten town (Lebanon, IN), arriving a little before 9:00 PM.

Then next morning we were on the road to Milwaukee, WI by 8:00 AM. Seemed a little early after our long Friday... but we were both itching to get out of the Motel 6! We arrived in Milwaukee only five hours later with an extra hour to explore because the great mathematician (me) did not remember we were crossing into the central standard time during this part of the drive. After a phone call with A.L.R.L. that required R.D.S. to pull over it was straight to the Miller Brewery. The tour was awesome... lots of biology put to work! Then we headed to Miller Park to watch the Brewers lose to the Giants. The loss was not part of the plan, but we still managed to enjoy the game! We saw Jesus on the jumbotron, or I should say a man dressed as Jesus... which is about as real as Jesus gets in my mind anyways. After the game we raced to the hotel (that's right, HOTEL) so R.D.S. could catch up on internet and I could check the football scores. Thanks to M.L. and E.R. we spent the night in big comfy beds, with locks on the doors, air conditioning, and running water at the Hilton in the Milwaukee City Center. You guys are the best!

Sunday by 8:15 AM we were traveling to Lenexa, KS. We stopped in Iowa City, IA to see the worlds largest wooden nickel and a black angel before heading to Des Moine, IA to see the the Anderson Erickson largest cow and calf statue! For those of you who do not know IA is the field of opportunites. Feeling down, consider relocation. Arriving in Kansas just after 7:30 PM we bonded with the C's, the B's, the M's, and the G's. Lots of old neighbor chat put R.D.S. to bed early and kept me up exta late.

Labor day we slept in (till 8:30 AM!) and enjoyed a real breakfast with J & S M followed by lots more reminiscing with old neigbors. A trip to Kansas would not be complete without a tour of Lawrence (better known as Kansas University). We met M.K.M. for lunch at Freestate Brewery, took pictures with a Jayhawk, waved some wheat, and saw M.K.M.'s adorable house. At 3:30 PM we decided we should hit the road with Denver lurking nine hours away! Very few stops that afternoon allowed us to arrive at midnight, crashing on the wood floors of R.D.S.'s new apartment!

The trip took its toll on us, but we still managed to send 501 postcards stating our arrival. We also toured the Denver Public Library (only because I needed a boarding pass, no I have not turned over a new leaf), went to a Rockies game (a come back win in the bottom of the 9th and upgraded seats, so worth it), and to perused 16th Street Mall. Traveled out.

"A careful driver is one who honks his horn when he goes through a red light." (Henry Morgan)

Midwesterner at Heart

Each person has something that defines them, something that sets them apart from others, that one thing that makes them unique. One thing everyone knows about me is I was born and raised in Kansas. I love Kansas and everything about it. Poor J.L.W. has really suffered the brunt of my love. She has constantly listen to me compare everything to Kansas. I left seven years ago, and I am still making comparisons. I can't help it. It is part of who I am.

There is nothing I can really put my finger on as to why Kansas is so great. The people? The Chiefs? The public pools? Definitely not the Royals. The schools (or the school spirit)? My fabulous neighbors? The Jayhawks? Going boating on the lake? Knowing where everything is? It is not one thing, its a combination of everything.

Recently I was able to stop by for less than a day to check up on things. Nothing has changed, and I love that. My life has drastically changed, yet I have remained nearly the same (or so they tell me). Sure I have matured, my hair has darkened, I have met new people, received a college education. Obviously I am not as close to my old freinds and neighbors. Sometimes that's sad but really what can you expect, time and distance tend to have that effect on people. I am just thankful I always have a place to call home, even if it isn't home anymore. Whenever I go back we pick up where we left off!

If I had a nickel for everytime someone told me, "Toto, I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore" (Wizard of Oz) I would be rich. Too bad I don't. Trust me, it's apparent I am not in Kansas anymore, but a part of me will always be in the heartland. My full apology for the cheesiness of that last statement.

Standarized Test

The overuse of standardized testing in this country disgusts me. In my naive mind I truly thought the SAT was the last of my standardized testing worries. Oh what a joke. College brings the GRE, MCAT, LSAT, FE... depending on where you want to go next. And since there are no jobs in this lovely country most of my friends and many others are choosing to further their education. It is terrifying. College graduates are not living up to the demands placed by these standardized test. For the majority of my friends, the material is not holding them back, often times it is learning how to take the test (do I answer the question or am I better off leaving it blank?). There is something wrong with that.

I bet you have heard of Kaplan, that wonderful company that charges you a 1000 plus dollars to teach you how to take a test. People swear by Kaplan, this is their future. I mean everything in education is an investment so this ungodly amount of money seems worth it. They make a guarantee but it is like all purchases, read the fine print. They guarantee to raise your score... not get you into med/law/grad school. You may dish out the money, take the class, still not perform well enough on the test, then eventually your score will decide med/law/grad school is not for you.

I am not bitter. I have not even taken one of these tests, yet. I was bitter, extremely bitter. In high school I performed horribly on my SAT. Later I learned my score was not so awful, just significantly below where I was expected to perform considering my academic standings. In my backwards mind (so American) I refused to take the ACT because I did not want to be mortified in front of my family, friends, and teachers again. I was so embarrassed by my score, I let it define me. Everything I had been involved in seemed worthless. I thought I was not going to get into college, well actually I had faith, but my guidance counselor told me I should look into tech schools. Excuse me, what is a tech school? Mind you, I graduated near the top of my high school class and went on to a wannabe top twenty public college and performed decent there.

I am not bragging at all. I am just trying to prove a point: standardized test have a limited ability to measure achievement. Before I subject myself to another silly standardized test that is going to label me with a number warning me to choose another path. Oh I can just hear the alarms now! "You are not cut out for grad school, you will never get funding." Assuming everything goes swell in Africa I will smile and think that I have already proved myself in the real world, an atmosphere I presume is slightly more challenging than grad school.

Pipe Dreams

One weekend when it seemed like K.F.A. and I were the only ones in town I took her to my ideal world. We started brainstorming big ideas to make this world even better. The kind of dreams you tell people about and they roll their eyes and say "like that would ever happen." K.F.A. and I decided we want to open a clinic in South America someday. I am putting this dream in writing so that when I look back on my plans later in life I will remember this one and how much I really want it to happen. I will try not to get ahead of myself here but I would also love to have this documentation to show people you truly need to be the change you wish to see in the world (Gandhi).

You see right now K.F.A. is anxiously awaiting the final moments before she takes the MCATS again. I can't tell you how much time and effort she has poured into preparing for this challenging exam. She is a saint! On top of studying for the MCAT, she is on student government transfer council, works twenty hours a week doing research, and is president of the biosci club. Oh and then there is class and all the things I am forgetting. Really though, she turns down football to study. That takes dedication and power!

I am in a bind. I need K.F.A. to do really well on the MCAT, get into med school, finish med school, and become a successful doctor. No pressure, right? It is not for me K.F.A., it is for the children of South America, not sure that relieves any pressure. I am at a major loss for words. Its seems silly to tell her "good luck on the MCAT" because if luck was all it took there would not be anything to prepare and strive for. The the MCAT is not your regular exam. And I can't tell her "I know you will do well" because realistically I do not know if she will do well. I would love for her to do well, hope she does well, and know she deserves (above all people) to do well. The second comment adds anxiety and stress (as if she does not have enough of that). She feels like if she does not perform as well as expected she will let everyone down (and more importantly her parents) This is not true. We all love you and are pulling for you every step of the way. Take a second to look at all you have accomplished. I am so envious of your study habits, your motivation, and your organization. Good news, you are only 21!

So K.F.A. do your best! I know you would make an amazing doctor and I can only hope your MCAT score shows that as well. This is America, but do not let that number define you... because you are way better than any number you "earn."

Recharging my batteries

In the past three and a half months I have visited eleven states and seen countless family members and friends. Instead of relaxing I have been hiking, volunteering, biking, driving, kayaking, babysitting, swimming, flying, and running. All of this has finally caught up with me. I am spent. Exactly two months from today I will board that dreaded plane and make my way to the lands of Lesotho. The nerves still have not kicked in and I am not really sure if they ever will. I am not really sure what to be nervous about. Ideas? Life is life no matter where you live it.

Tonight I finally looked at all the financial stuff. It does not seem nearly as daunting as I once thought. I prepared my press release statement and then realized there was not any paper I really felt tied too... so that seems like a waste. I also made a real list of everything I want to bring, and it is definitely more than fifty pounds. I guess I will learn to cut down when it comes closer to time.

I will just keep acting patient and dreaming of far off lands. Oh and learning to use my new complicated macbook.

Take me home

I hate flying and everything about it. Screaming babies, lots of germs, being packed in like sardines, delays, the security, the same instructions repeated a hundred times (only to watch the same idiots miss the message), the freezing plane temperature, the liquid restrictions. I do not have one positive thing to say about air transportation. Oh and I have done the math. If you are flying anywhere that would take eight hours or less by car you are safer (much safer!) driving.

I consider myself a relatively social person, social people like to talk. It seems like an airplane would be a great place to meet people. Negative! I always try to at least introduce myself and gesture a polite hello. This freaks people out. Not everyone, I have met some very cool people... but the majority pretend they can't hear me. Come on, no book I have ever read has been that good. And news flash, I know those head phones are not actually playing music (I make sure to make my introduction before we reach 10000 feet altitude).

Then there are the people who always seem to be in such a hurry. Believe it or not everyone is going to board the plane. Oh adults, we learned to stop "cutting" in first grade! Do you need to be reminded? If you really feel the need to cut, please go ahead of me, I want to be on that plane the shortest amount of time possible. Not to mention most planes still assign seats, so you can't possibly be trying to beat me to that isle seat (or window seat, if you are like J.L.W.). And then when the plane lands those same people want to be the first people off. Chill out. When it is time for your row to exit you can leave, it is not worth knocking people over. We all want off the plane as quickly as possible and you being in such a hurry slows us all down. Coming from an extremely impatient person, this should mean a lot. If I can tolerate the airport inefficiency so can you.

Yesterday when I wrote this I did not actually talk about the flying, the part that terrifies me to no end, so I am updating now to make my point clear. I would not get in a car with a driver I did not know. However, when I hop on a plane I have no idea about the pilot or his flight history. I am lucky if I get to see his/her face. That makes me extremely uncomfortable. Then there are like a million planes in the sky at one time. When I take the time to learn how planes actually fly and how air traffic control works I may feel comforted. At the present time this information is not in my brain.

In my own professional working world opinion I think being a flight attendant would be the absolute worst job on the planet. Besides actually flying from Boston Logan to Washington Dulles to Phoenix Sky Harbor daily you have to listen to people complain, serve people, and collect trash. Most of you wear fake smiles all the time, few people are that happy. Your ears probably pop nonstop, you bounce between time zones, and your routine is probably about as irregular as it gets. Now I know all this because I have performed your job. Not.

Now for those of you who took the time to read this rant I am not always this frazzled. I just have a strong passionate hatred of flying. Though, you probably could not tell. "There are only two emotions on a plane: boredom and terror!" (Orson Welles)

Kobi

When I was twelve years old I found the cutest puppy the world had every bred! I found him with some friends on the way back from camp, among a litter of six puppies. I was attached immediately (even though I had two other dogs at home) and convinced Grams to let me keep him until my parents got back from Canada. My parents resolved to give me the pup for my thirteenth birthday. He was the best gift in the world and the love of my life. I named him Kobi.

I was obsessed with him (and that is probably an understatement). My life revolved around this dog. Next to running, Kobi helped make the move to South Carolina and later Georgia bearable. Bringing him was like bringing a friend along. We ran. We swam. We went to the dog park. We took lots of pictures. We laughed. We moved (twice). We cried. We roller-bladed. We hiked. We took baths. We did dishes. We combed our hair. We checked for ticks. We rode our bikes. We played in the snow. We jumped on the trampoline. All these things we did together, just me and my pup.

We were not always alone though. Before the trek to SC, we had M.E.C. and her dogs to hang with. Life was perfect! Everyday after school we met at the KOS Trail (named appropriately after our dogs; Kobi, Olivia, and Sadie) to run, jump, skip, and play! Olivia is the C's adorable golden retriever (often questioned as the mother of Kobi and Sadie), and Sadie was one of the six pups we found--Kobi's sister. M.E.C. and I were practically sisters so it was only right that our dogs were related as well. Needless to say there was major separation anxiety from all parties when Kobi and I left.

Unfortunately, we never recovered. During my sophomore year of college on a hot Georgia afternoon Kobi bit C.A.'s friend, requiring ten staples in his leg. Kobi had never hurt anyone before. We were always extremely careful because we knew he had aggression issues. He was especially protective of my dad and me. My parents could not tell me about the incident until a few weeks later when I came home for summer break (with high hopes of spending the summer with Kobi). They knew I would drop out/fail out of school and fight for his life. We ended up having to put Kobi to sleep as soon as I got home from college and said goodbye. My parents tried to do everything in their power to keep him. The sheriff was not having it.

I think everyone in my family would agree that despite moving four times in six years, encountering sport-ending knee injuries, and being diagnosed with gout that saying goodbye to Kobi was the hardest thing we ever had to do. To make matters worse, I headed to Kansas to spend a week long planned out before the "incident" with M.E.C., Olivia, and Sadie the day we put Kobi down. Their cute faces, cold kisses, and muddy paws served as a reminder to what wouldn't be there when I returned home.

"Dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. They are the role model for being alive." (Gilda Radner)

Texts From Last Night

(803): Coach H says, "how is the Saint Bernard?"
(1-803): What?
(803): Apparently that is some sort of inside joke.
(1-803): Yeah, between him and someone else.

When I got this random text from R.D.S. the other night I was not sure what she was talking about. Now that I am college graduate there have been plenty of high school memories intentionally left behind, like this one. During cross country races and even some really hard practices I could not seem to control my drooling. It was disgusting, but I could not help it. Needless to say I earned the nickname Saint Bernard.

Fashion Sins

Let me preface this by saying I am in no way the queen of fashion. I know I am being a total hypocrite for even commenting on the way someone dresses, but bear/bare with me for a second while I learn a lesson we all know yet hardly obey.

High school me rambling (at this time R.D.S. and I were not friends, although I most definitely would have given her my most honest, typically blunt, opinion had we been): "I dress for comfort, most days sporting a t-shirt and jeans. I never look stylish or fashionable. Unlike teacher's pet, R.D.S. I do know that a long jean skirt screams fashion faux pas. They are outdated, age-inappropriate (for all ages really, but especially a high schooler), and ill-fitting. This sort of outfit is something that should only be seen on TLC's hit reality show 18 Kids and Counting or What Not to Wear.

Part of me wanted to get to know her and her friend (who also wore one of these biblical skirts). I was so anxious to hear all about their homeschool experience. In my short life I have never heard of a circumstance where being called a homeschooler is a compliment, 99% of the time they fit the stereotype. Nonetheless, homeschoolers fascinate me, and homeschoolers gone public school are even more mesmerizing! Then I learned she wasn't homeschool, neither was her friend. Major sigh. Turns out they thought wearing these skirts and buying the teacher Frosties was normal? Oh they have so much to learn I thought... but then again, so do I.

There are only three reasons one would support this style of clothing; they are clueless, they are homeschooled, and/or they like to dress insanely conservative/biblically. There is absolutely nothing wrong with any of these three things. I am just a person of reason, I needed an answer as to why she was wearing this ridiculous thick and long piece of cloth. I ruled out clueless--she had way more friends than I did and was in decently intelligent classes. She was also a pop culture buff (and I knew this sitting half way across the room from her) so she had some fashion sense, or at least read about it. Much to my dismay, I crossed homeschooler of the list. And from what I could tell she was not a super conservative dresser because on other days she wore a much more age appropriate short jean skirt with these beads on it."

I never got my answer. She brought that skirt to college and still loved it, despite its slightly worn form. In college, R.D.S. and I became friends through her roommate. I did not hide my feelings on the skirt for long. So as we all know, do not judge a book by its cover... or a person by their outfit. Right now, I am traveling halfway across the country to Denver (where that skirt would not be tolerated in any instance). Luckily for all, the skirt did not make the cut and has been kindly donated. Had I seriously judged her for what she wore I might have missed out on a pretty good friendship.

R.I.P. Duggar Skirt. We will laugh about you often.

I am also not a professional photographer, but rest assured, the picture at the top was not taken by me or even in my presence and serves only to make a point... not to demonstrate my work. :)

Sinful Life

In honor of the college football season starting up today I decided I am going to write about the best team in baseball, the Atlanta Braves. I have been an extremely sinful fan this season, only making it to one game... and living in a state that chooses to broadcast the Washington Nationals (as if they have a following). We all know the Braves have the biggest following in baseball, the city of Atlanta really rallies around the team. Okay, not really, but I sure do.

I made a compromise with the Braves. I decided I would make a pit stop at Miller Park today on my half cross country road trip. It was not really on the way per se, but it will be more than worth it. My end of the deal requires me pouring my heart and soul into being the best Milwaukee Brewers fan in the park, ensuring they beat the San Francisco Giants. The Braves simply have to win... win, win. If the Braves hold up their end of the deal, I will be sure to venture to Mile High Stadium to watch the Cincinnati Reds destroy the Colorado Rockies (which happens to be my final destination on this half cross country road trip.

You see, right now, the Braves are four games behind the Rockies in the National League Wild Card race, only three games behind the Giants. That is respectable heading into the homestretch of the season. I would just love love love to see the Braves make it to the playoffs before I leave for Lesotho (where I will sadly miss the next two seasons). How does one exist in a life without sports?

Life in the desert

I have been to Arizona many times to visit Grams, and as always, I had a blast. I thought it was going to be a relaxing vacation of sitting by the pool, finishing my books, and playing LOTS of cards. Oh I was terribly mistaken.

I arrived in Arizona after a busy week of work extremely jet-lagged, immediately I was off to the pool. The next day after an 8AM wake up call (which happened to be the latest I would get to sleep in while in AZ!!!!) I was in the car with grams headed up to Red Rock Country (Sedona)! On the way up to Sedona we stopped in Jerome (the vertical city). It was so disappointing and run down we did not even bother to stay for lunch. I am not sure grams agreed but I think the stop was worth the view of the Verde Valley. When we made it to Sedona we had time to hike West Fork and caught an amazing sunset!

The next day we were up early and I enjoyed an off road jeep adventure. It was so much fun! My tour guide happened to be a Biology major back in his day so he taught me all about the plants of the southwest, fascinating! I met some awesome follks from Washington State who offered to let me come a visit. Free lodging? I will be there in two years, no doubt! After the tour we hiked the Bell Rock Path. 110 Degrees, 2 hours of fast paced hiking, 20 ounces of water. Bad planning.

Friday and Saturday I did a little exploring of Fountain Hills on my own while Grams worked. Prior to work both days (because being in AZ means rising early) we managed to do about 6 miles of hiking (Lost Dog Trail on Friday; Saturday was less hiking and more running around the 3rd tallest fountain in the world) I got some time to talk on my phone, catch some rays, and read my book. Hooray! Saturday night we went to a fundraiser for the Fountain Hills Museum. Oh small towns, oh total chaos, oh old people! Afterwards we caught her 80 year old friend Jim singing at the hotel in town. It was so funny, and his wife was a real character!

On Sunday Grams took me to her place of work, We-ko-pa. I cringe at admitting it is the nicest golf course I have ever seen because anything that terrible for the environment can not possibly be goregous! I guess when the charge you a million dollars per round per person you should expect nothing else, still... To redeem themselves for killing planet earth they do make some pretty killer food! We also made it to REI where I officially FINISHED(!!!!) all my shopping for the Peace Corps, at least I think I did! I also got to meet her friend Suzanne (over Starbucks) who shares a common interest in ants. And I thought I was the only one! It was not until Sunday that we finally busted out the Skip-bo cards. No worries, I won and proudly claimed all 45 cents of my winnings! Oh I think I failed to mention, Sunday was our day of rest?

Monday we went to Eagle Nest and I hiked what might be my favorite trail of all time! The views of Four Peaks were amazing, the desert landscape was serene, and there was a mine at the end of the trail. There was plenty of time for reflection and pictures. I slowed the pace and really took time to enjoy my surroundings, after all, it was my last day in Fountain Hills for awhile. Sigh. In the late afternoon I caught a nap at the pool and a few more wins in Skip-bo!

Grams, thanks for being a wonderful host. Thanks for making me get out of bed and fill everyday with new adventures. I promise I will recharge my batteries, that is, after my half cross country road trip to Denver. Travel on.

Happy Birthday Dad!

Today it's my pops 51st birthday! Oh boy, is getting old!?!  I thought in honor of this day I would share one of my fondest childhood memories of my him. 

On top of working 60+ hour weeks, travel, his wife and two other children, golf, marathon training (you get the picture, pops is a busy guy) he found time to coach my softball team for a number of years.   The best year was definitely the year of the Peppermint Patties, probably because we won the most games that year of any year I played.  Winning really is everything.  It wasn't really the softball that I enjoyed though, it was the rides to the softball games I longed for.  

My mom had C.A. early in the Peppermint Patties softball season.   It was too hot for the baby and C.D. so mom would bring the boys out later, leaving quality time for pops and me!  We rode out to JCGAA blasting Queens "Bicycle Race" and some of their other hits.  I used to go over the batting order and field positions on the way to the games, mostly to add my own opinions.  My dad never let me look at them till we got in the car so I was always curious to see if I was playing catcher or second base.  He always told me it did not matter where I played or where I was on the batting order, all that mattered is that I did my best.  

When I was trying to get my facts straight last night I learned a lot about the silly politics of recreational softball.  I am so relieved to find out I did not know about most of the politics until last night.  I was awful at softball, but I am thankful I never knew.  I am so glad my parents were laid back about sports.  My parents truly let me enjoy the games!   They encouraged me to go after my dreams, try new things, and be the best that I could be.  And the thing is, pops really meant it.  Thanks!  Happy Birthday!  

Nostalgia

In high school running defined me. I ate, slept, and breathed in running. Everything I did revolved around running. I had zero friends, I hated school, and I had a dog with an energy problem. Running also saved my high school experience, and frankly, it saved me. Through running I met my circle of friend, J.L.W. (no, that is not meant to be friendS). Running helped me concentrate in school or at least get into a state college. And it helped calm my d-o-g, on occasion! If nothing else, it allowed me to compete... and I love winning.

Now, the youngest H is running. C.A. has his second meet today and I can already tell he is taking a liking to the sport. He eats pasta before his races, goes to bed early(ier) before races, and drinks ten times more water than the average fourteen year old. The sport requires so much sacrifice and dedication, even for the slowest runner. I already LOVE watching him run, reliving the glory days. Cross country is typically a non-spectator sport but something about it totally captivates me. It definitely fills my competitive side. The combination of individual and team competition always inspired me to push myself, not only for a personal record (PR) but also to help the team.

C.A., I am not sure why you are running or even if you know. You have a plethora of friends. You are so anxious and excited for what your high school years hold. Your dog is old and lazy. I am just happy you chose the sport, even if you only stick it out for your freshman year!

No matter how fast or slow you run you will always make me proud! I am so glad I get to be here to watch you race a few times (if nothing else I owe it to you... I know you did not miss a single meet of mine)! Run your heart out today!

"Every morning in Africa a gazelle wakes up. It knows it must move faster than the lion or it will not survive. Every morning a lion wakes up and it knows it must move faster than the slowest gazelle or it will starve. It doesn't matter if you are the lion or the gazelle, when the sun comes up, you better be moving." (Maurice Greene)

No sympathy here

I just spent the week in Fountain Hills, AZ on my final stop of my Tour of Family adventure. Most of the tour has been filled with questions, wonder, and excitement. On this stop there have been very few questions. She is a world traveler and thinks there is not a better opportunity in the world. Grams sees joining the Peace Corp as my calling in life. To her, it is something I need to do! She is more excited that I am actually taking advantage of the opportunity to travel and become immersed in another culture. This is not to say she is not proud, but she has become very spiritual late in life and again thinks this is what I should be doing.

The Peace Corp is something I have always want to be apart of. I am excited beyond belief (countdown: 2 months 11 days) about the upcoming experience! The adventure is not going to be easy, but I did not get any sympathy from Grams. She asked me what I was going to miss the most, and two of the things I replied with were my cell phone and internet. She kindly smiled (a polite way to tell me thats ridiculous)! It is not even that I need my cell phone, but I do get pleasure from being able to catch up with friends, pass time while I am driving, or notify someone if I am running late. As for the internet I think the instant gratification of email would be nice so far away. Plus, I enjoy reading blogs, hearing about new ways to save the world, and getting sports updates. It's more that I like these luxuries not that I need them. She asked, I answered.

Grams can't understand those two things because she does not have them. She can't ration the idea of someone being able to get ahold of her whenever they want! People have come to expect her when she gets there. You would never know if she was lost or running late. People start calling her at 6:15AM because they know that is the only time they can reach her at home. She is always out and about living life to the fullest. I guess early morning phone calls are the consequence of no cell phone. Not worth it, to me! Do not even get her started on the internet, that's a generation thing. She survives just fine with the librarys internet use for netflix (and that is it). I frankly do not and will not understand it. More power to her?